Positively (Im)perfect

Written and published on December 16th, 2012. Archived to previous year.  It's impossible to jump right in to evaluating this past week without acknowledging what's defined it for all of us. I wish, like the rest of the world, for some sort of explanation, some way to understand the tragedies of the world that make no sense. I don't have any words of wisdom or answers to the questions we all ask when bad things happen to the innocent. In fact, I don't really have much at all to say, because there just is no way to quantify that feeling we all have, the tightness in our chest or the ache in our heart. But I will say the few things that I know to be true, and also echo my sentiments from this reflection I wrote on loss , as well as these thoughts I shared after the shooting at the movie theater a few miles from our home: I know there is good in the world. I know that God loves every last one of us more than we can fathom, even more than those parents love their beaut

Written and published on December 10th, 2012. Archived to previous year.  A link-up of Goals and Accomplishments! Evaluation from  last week : Okay, so Christmas cards are (mostly-ish) addressed and in the mail. Do you see why it usually takes me until February to get these things done? Three weeks running it has been my goal to get these puppies done and I'm still dragging it out. But they will be finished before Christmas this year. They will be! I did get cracking on the reading corner, though...made a few adjustments to the plan that will make it even better--just waiting on some materials now! ~MOTIVATION~  What did I accomplish last week? First of all, I clearly did not accomplish getting around to the rest of you lovely linker ladies' blogs last week! Sorry! So I'm planning on catching up this week on my reading to see all the awesome ways you made it count! As for what I did accomplish, I updated about a million addresses during the Christmas Card

Written and published on December 3rd, 2012. Archived to previous year.  A link-up of Goals and Accomplishments! Evaluation from  last week : Well, I got my Christmas cards (mostly!)  finished. I got the pictures, wrote the letter, and made our printer do a WHOLE lot of work. Now I just have to stuff envelopes and address them all. And so far I haven't been too stressed--hopefully I can keep it that way! ~MOTIVATION~  What did I accomplish last week? This week went slightly differently than planned...I don't relish taking three kids to the doctor during naptime, but we ruled out strep throat and they were perfectly fine and chipper as ever by the end of the week. And the trip to the doctor's office was a definite accomplishment! I also did the Christmas card thing, went to a meeting, and had a full weekend with a holiday party at our local historic mansion (pretty cool!) and a fabulous "Friendsgiving" with our amazing new family of friends. I also c

Written and published on November 26th, 2012. Archived to previous year.  A link-up of Goals and Accomplishments! Evaluation from  last week : My first goal of being thankful was an easy one--and give thanks, I did ! Though very different than the past few years, we had an absolutely wonderful Thanksgiving. My second goal of exercising more also went well; I managed one run, two walks with the dog and kids, and two non-aerobic workouts. More than I've done in a  l o n g  time in terms of exercise (save chasing and lifting kids all day)! ~MOTIVATION~  What did I accomplish last week? As I said, I did a good job with exercise and giving thanks. I also made some Thanksgiving pies, including my mom's award-winning chocolate chip pecan pie, and made homemade mashed potatoes for the first time--about eight pounds worth! And to top it all off, I thoroughly enjoyed Thanksgiving dinner at our in-laws, meeting a distant cousin of theirs for the first time who just mov

Written and published on November 19th, 2012. Archived to previous year.    A link-up of Goals and Accomplishments! Evaluation from  last week : My goal was simple--to love others more. I failed miserably. Well, I guess I had a few redeeming moments. But we had an unexpectedly stressful and anxiety-ridden week (things like car troubles, the third offer on the house we  still  own fell through, our heat went out, etc.), which unfortunately didn't bring out the best in me. But I did spend some time baking with the kids, and I stopped once or twice to admire all how adorable they are and remind myself of all the many things I love about them; I also checked myself a few times when some less-than-kindly thoughts started to take over. Hopefully I'll fare much better this week, though! ~MOTIVATION~  What did I accomplish last week? Although some of my accomplishments weren't intended, I did get a fair amount done this week. As I said, I baked with the kids

Written and published on November 12th, 2012. Archived to previous year.    A link-up of Goals and Accomplishments! First of all, Happy Veterans Day to all of our fellow veterans out there. We are forever grateful for our many dear friends who have sacrificed so much, and for all those who are still serving and in harm's way. Veterans Day is just another day to remind you how grateful we are for each and every day you've given and all those you continue to give. If you're interested, I've shared a few thoughts in the past about the sacrifices of our military here: To Those Who Serve When the Unthinkable Happens Surviving Deployment The Next Day: A Reflection And now back to your regularly scheduled program--Make It Count Monday! Evaluation from  last week : After pleading for your advice last week on how to figure out a housekeeping schedule, I actually had a pretty awesome week! I appreciated everyone's suggestions, and though I didn't

Written and published on November 4th, 2012. Archived to previous year.    A Link-Up of Goals and Accomplishments! Evaluation from  last week : We still had a busy week, but my goal of quality time with my husband was definitely realized during our little five-year-anniversary staycation this past weekend! Potty training went fairly well--I was a lot more focused and there were only a few accidents--and I absolutely enjoyed Halloween with the kids! As far as the room cleaning...I procrastinated like a champ but I'm working on it. Really! (Hanging my head in shame...). ~MOTIVATION~  What did I accomplish last week? This past week was more of a recovery week coming off the business of the week before. And while Hurricane Sandy really threw a wrench in things across the entire country, I think it also helped me (and many others) slow down and reflect a bit more on the important things in life. Sadly, that's quite an accomplishment itself in this day and

Written and published on October 29th, 2012. Archived to previous year.    A link-up of Goals and Accomplishments! Evaluation from  last week : Quality time was a tough one this past week! My husband and I had so much going on that we only got to sit down twice for some real one-on-one time. But I did succeed in finishing the party prep and costume making...along with a WHOLE  bunch of other stuff that serves as this week's motivation! ~MOTIVATION~  What did I accomplish last week? I packed more into this week than I think I have in a long, long time. So much, in fact, that I wasn't sure if I was going to get it all done. But I did...I wrote my final guest post over at  Ms.MommyHH6 , (which will be published later today), planned and pulled off a party, sewed a costume by hand, got together with friends and family nearly every day, went to three birthday celebrations in one weekend, made it through the emotional roller coaster of my son turning one (I never

Written and published on October 22nd, 2012. Archived to previous year.    A link-up of Goals and Accomplishments! Happy fall Monday to all! Here's my evaluation from  last week's goals : I actually did pretty well at "unplugging" this week; I deleted my shortcuts to Facebook and Pinterest and all of those other time-stealers, which helped immensely, and I limited (most) of my social media time to during naptime and after the kids were in bed. I still got distracted on occasion or prolonged some of my online visits, but it was a marked improvement from last week. And a vast improvement overall. And you know what? It's amazing how much I didn't miss it. And how much more seemed to be going on in my real life (and how much less was going on in my online life) when I wasn't as invested in my addiction. I still had to fight that nervous twitch of mindlessly checking my phone every other minute, but the deleted apps helped curb it. I felt like I finally

Written and published on October 15th, 2012. Archived to previous year.    A link-up of Goals and Accomplishments! Happy Monday! The fourth week of Make It Count Mondays, to be exact! It's exciting to realize that it's been nearly one month since the beginning of this deliberate goal-setting process. I'm not sure whether I've actually done much more than I was doing before, but everything I  have  done has been with a greater focus throughout each day. Which is half the battle (at least for me)! So cheers to becoming slightly more self-aware, and here's to an even better start to month two! Evaluation from  last week : My goal of reconnecting with friends and family went very well--we had some great conversations and "quality"  time together, even though we were all separated by a few thousand miles. But it made me realize how many other amazing people I haven't spent time connecting with lately, so I'll have to make more time for them! M

Written and published on October 8th, 2012. Archived to previous year.    Happy Holiday Monday! I hope that in addition to making today count, you have the pleasure of taking today off thanks to Columbus sailing the ocean blue 520 years ago! If you don't, have no fear...you can still make it count wherever you are!  Evaluation from last week:   Last week  my goals were to continue waking up with my alarm and finding times to contain social media interactions. I did...okay. Not horrible but not great, either. It's still tough to obey my alarm when I know that after I silence it, it will stay silent and not yell at me if I happen to head grumbling back towards the bed. I know going to bed earlier helps, but this wasn't a banner week for that, either. Regarding social media, I kept most of my writing and posting to naptime and post-bedtime so I would spend more time interacting with the kids throughout the day. But I still had a hard time breaking the insidious ha

Written and published on September 30th, 2012. Archived to previous year.    Happy Monday, ya'll--and welcome to the second ever Make It Count Monday! Before you groan too loudly, I'm here to remind you that another Monday means that yes, we've just made it through another week, and the calendar now presents us with seven new beautiful days upon which to bestow our weekly goals! So let the positivity begin! Continue on we shall... ~MOTIVATION~   (What did I accomplish last week?) My goal last week was to set my alarm and get up before the kids during the week. Which I did exactly four out of five "work" days. Though it's tempting to bemoan the days I didn't meet my goal, I will recognize that I gave my kids (and myself!) four more days of breakfast together and four fewer hours of TV (or sleep in my case. Not the point though). Other accomplishments: I learned some sign language to communicate with an awesome preschool mom who is heari

Written and published on September 24th, 2012. Archived to previous year.    Hey, there, and welcome to Make It Count Monday! What is that, you ask? Why, a nifty lil' idea of mine where we can share both our goals and accomplishments each week! Yeah, I'll explain a little more. I talked last week about needing to give ourselves more credit for the many little things we do each day. I loved reading about all the amazing things you guys were doing, and I loved getting to congratulate myself with a well-deserved pat on the back between diaper changes (yes I washed my hands first). It felt pretty good! But I realized while mundanely transferring the darks from the washer into the dryer that I should be doing that a lot more often (both the laundry and the pats on the back). I need more than a one-time deal; I need a rather swift kick in the pants to get going--and stay going. Well three kicks, really: One for direction, one for motivation, and one for accountability. E

Originally published on September 18, 2011 It’s amazing to realize how much has transpired in the space of a year. Pearl earrings from Peter--for our baby who would have been due in June A mere year and change ago, I was in a pretty dark place, having seen yet another “specialist,” trying to process the word ‘infertility’ as it was being thrown at me, and wondering what it meant for our future—a future that we’d dreamed would be filled with the beautiful chaos of lots of kids in the years to come. Then, within weeks of hearing that ugly word, we were face to face with the full reality of my diagnosis as it played out in front of us, saying goodbye to the new little life that we’d created with God’s help, seemingly filled with promise. Three months later, another painful goodbye. I knew it was pointless to question God’s will, since my mere human logic simply couldn't comprehend infinite wisdom. But I felt I wasn't ready to let go of the dreams we had or the expectat

Originally published on September 14, 2011 "This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it."  -Psalm 118:24 Lately I’ve had some heavy things weighing on my heart, and it’s hard to write about light-hearted subjects with more important things running through my head. Though I’ve tried to push such thoughts away when it comes to putting words on the page, my motivation for triviality has fallen flat. So I’ve realized that maybe it’s time to do just that—time to address the things that matter most. On certain days my heart sinks as soon as I pull in to the parking lot at work. It has nothing to do with my workload that day or a busy schedule; it’s the flag in front of my Division Headquarters that gets me. Most days it flies high and mighty and proud above the building for all to see. But more often than it should, it flutters quietly at half-mast, the same level as the monument that stands across from it to honor the soldiers from For

Originally published on August 23, 2011 I'm excited to share my first published magazine article! Thanks to all my dear family and friends for your encouragement throughout the process, and especially to my greatest inspiration when it comes to writing and life in general--my beautiful mother! The following piece appears on pages 7-8 of the  Fall 2011 Issue of Radiant Magazine : FINDING TRUE HEALING by Megan Hjelmstad Radiant Magazine, Fall 2011 Issue ( credit )  “Well, honey, you’re the Captain of your own ship! Good luck!” It wasn’t the first time I’d heard something like this from an OB-GYN, and it certainly wouldn't be the last. I left the appointment with loads of pills but no explanation, and true to the Army way, it seemed I had only two options: control or failure. I walked back to my dorm, frustrated that I’d left with more questions than when I’d arrived, and wondered what to do next. I’d had painful menstrual cycles since high school; at

Originally published on August 11th, 2011 Ok, ladies (and you guys manly enough to admit it), it’s time to face the music: we are not nice to ourselves. It’s clear that our society focuses on form over function, and most of us take the bait without a fight. We’re masters at holding up the magnifying glass to pick and prod at every little imperfection we can find. And by degrading ourselves to such a level that we can’t find one good thing to say about our bodies, we consciously or subconsciously do the same to others. We constantly compare ourselves (and others) to what we’re fed to believe is ‘prefect,’ and when we don’t measure up (as we’re bound not to) we become caught in the vicious cycle of superficial self-betterment and shrinking self-esteem. We might as well be walking tabloids.  (Cue another frantic yet futile search for miracle creams that  surely  will erase wrinkles, acne, under-eye circles, cellulite, ghostly skin...).

Originally published on June 27, 2011 I wish I could say that our potty training adventures bring out the best in me; that I approach each saga channeling my inner   June Cleaver   with a happy sing-song voice and dazzling smile, full of encouragement and enthusiasm that assumes nothing less than success as my darling girl beams up at me with proud little eyes. Not so. I think I more closely resemble this gal: Oh I can encourage, alright. I can coax, prod, and reason, offer up m&ms till I’m blue in the face, beg and plead...and eventually threaten and count to three while giving The Look. But at this stage of the game I’m about out of tactics.

Originally published on May 6, 2011 4 generations! The cartoon on my day calendar a few years ago summed it up pretty well. A new mother stood in front of the CEO's desk at “Motherhood, Inc.” listening to her job description. The employer stated, “You will work a 24-hour shift daily, to include weekends. No breaks allowed. You get one vacation day a year…it’s called Mother’s Day, but you still have to work.” There’s nothing like the honest truth to give you a good laugh. I’ve learned a lot about motherhood in the past 3+ years (exponentially more than I had in the 20+ years prior!), and while I'm no expert, I know there's still a lot more to it than is contained in that simple cartoon. I’ve learned that you are a mother long before you hold your child in your arms. From the moment you see that plus sign (or the actual word ‘pregnant’ if you don’t believe that the plus sign is dark enough and you make your husband go get the expensive kind), you’re a mom. From