"Happy" Memorial Day (And Other Thoughts)

Another Memorial Day is approaching, and with it, mixed feelings that fill the hearts of many service members and their families. 

For a large portion of our nation, Memorial Day is simply the unofficial start of summer and a happy chance to escape work on a Monday.

But at its heart, Memorial Day is the singular day each year that honors all the men and women who have died in service to our country (not to be confused with Veteran's Day in November, which honors anyone, living or deceased, who has served in the Armed Forces). 

Memorial Day began as a local tradition shortly after the Civil War, when loved ones would decorate the graves of deceased service members. It became known as Decoration Day, and eventually May 30th was reserved for the day of remembrance because flowers across the country would be blooming (although Colorado is making a strong case against that this year). 

In 1971, Memorial Day was officially declared a national holiday. It remains the only day of the year that our nation sets aside to honor the men and women who have paid the ultimate sacrifice. 

Sadly, with all the barbecuing and pool-opening and we-can-finally-wear-white rejoicing, it feels like the honoring and remembering have become a small endnote that puts a damper on all that "Happy" Memorial Day cheer. 

It's certainly not a day meant to shroud ourselves in a national cloud of despair and grief. But "happy" also isn't quite accurate. The holiday is meant to be a solemn yet prideful day that memorializes the few who gave it all, the ones who laid down their lives after signing up to protect freedoms we enjoy daily, freedoms that we forget were not so easily or bloodlessly attained for us. 

It is one, solitary day out of 365 days that we are given a chance to remember and honor these individuals--despite the fact that their Gold Star families live the reality of this remembrance every moment of the remaining 364 days beyond Memorial Day.

So let's not be so hasty this year to indulge in just the perks while forgetting the primary meaning of Memorial Day. Barbecues and gatherings and cheering on summer are good and fun, don't get me wrong. But let's commit to remembering and honoring first. 

Let's learn and share their stories. 

Let's show (and not just tell) their families that they're not forgotten, especially on their day. 

Let's tell our children about what this holiday really means. 

Let's set a reminder to stop wherever we are at 3pm on Monday for a minute of silence to honor and remember, as the National Moment of Remembrance encourages all Americans to do. 

And with every "Happy" Memorial Day that slips past our ears, let's remember that while it may not actually be marked by happiness for many, it is backed by so much more: fierce love, anguish, pride, and the hearts of families, friends, and comrades filled to the brim with cherished memories. 

If you can spend more than a minute, I encourage you to take time this weekend to remember and honor at least one deceased service member. If you don't know of anyone personally, I invite you to read the stories of five of our closest friends and classmates below. I'm grateful for all the memories I have and the ways they each impacted me directly; the hardest part is that for each of them, I could share ten more names and a million more stories--and those are just the ones I know of. 

Tyler Parten

Sal Corma

Sara Knutson Cullen

Dan Hyde (whose mother also wrote a book about him here) 

Tim Steele

These...and so, so many others. May all our memorialized service members, each and every one of them, be given the honor they're due. Be thou at peace, friends.